I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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