I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
