I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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