Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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