i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
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