What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
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