And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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