we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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