Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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