Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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