I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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