names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Randomize
