16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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