So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
