No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
