If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
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