Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize
