Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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