what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
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My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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