Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
