ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Randomize
