ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Randomize
