it wasn't lemon gatorade
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
