Someone shit on the floor
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
