How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
