i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
