a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
