we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
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