Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
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I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
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Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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