So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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