they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
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