Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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