Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I smell like Dick and happiness
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
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