He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
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