I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
