I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
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Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I will pee on everything he values.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
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When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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