Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Are we still banned from the library?
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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