So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
