What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
