My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
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