dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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