4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
If that was your dad, he is hot
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
