The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize