i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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