Buhtt sex?
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
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How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
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Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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