He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Randomize