Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
