Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.