I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
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