My nipple is on Facebook.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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