You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
