I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
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